New Blog Policy

It has been unofficial blog policy for some time now that men are not welcome here. Very rarely, I let a male comment. Starting now, I am officially letting all the women here know that men are now barred from commenting on this blog. I had made a few exceptions when the man was extremely over-the-top kind or in cases when by the time I logged on, there was already a string of comments from women talking to him and I didn’t want to lose their hard work in replying.

However, from now on, if you see a man commenting here, please do not respond to him. When I log on again I will remove the comment.

We need to be able to speak to each other without a man in the room and we have that right. This is already a space that can be seen by them. They do not need to participate, too.

Just having one around changes our comfort levels and how we speak to each other, what we choose to share, etc. This is not the place for fearing or being uncomfortable around males. If you see a NICE one comment, you can link him to THIS post until I get back to delete his comment. IF YOU WANT. Otherwise, just wait. I’ll deal with him asap.

I will also go through some of the old posts and remove any male comments I see. I have not wanted to mess up YOUR comments, so I left some up if you were in a discussion, but it annoys me that they are in my/our space, so they need to go.

Okay that’s it. Happy super dark moon! Here she comes!

sea__moon_at_mid_night-wide

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22 thoughts on “New Blog Policy

  1. This is, I believe, a wise decision; so glad to hear it!

    “Just having one around changes our comfort levels … ” This is so true, and it’s palpable when they’re here, whether they are poisoning the space with their sociopathy, or triggering our fears, defence mechanisms, or even our sentimentality for clueless “nice guys.” Whatever the case, the conversation is NEVER advanced by including male voices, or by female voices defending them. And for women who are sentimental about men: they perhaps need women-only space in an even more urgent way. Learning to speak freely takes time and practice. Many, many of us do not have opportunities to speak and think freely in our everyday lives. These radical feminist blogs may be the only spaces we currently have where we can test out our thinking/feeling and where we can learn from one another.

  2. There are plenty of women who come here with opposing viewpoints. We do not need to be in the presence of our masters while discussing their oppression of us. I, on a personal level, do not like men. I am not obligated to speak to them simply because they have something to say to me. Many of the women who visit this blog to not like men either, and I will not subject my sisters to the class of people who abuse us. You haven’t seen a lot of men here because I delete their comments. This has unofficially been my stance for a long time, but I am now making it the official policy.

    I am not interested in male opinions. I really am not. I want to hear from women.

  3. oopster–first, to make “broad, sweeping statements” is necessary for women (and other oppressed groups, too) in order to NAME our situation. Just because, for example, the man who delivers your mail is a swell guy, or just because your dad taught you self-defence, or your brother picks up your kids from school, does not cancel out our need to make broad statements about how men oppress, violate and humiliate us–one class having power over another class, and in one direction. It IS broad. It IS sweeping. This is basic feminism.

    Second, this business about, ” … but I believe you should always try to keep an open mind and be willing to change to alter your viewpoint … ” is simply aggression wrapped up in euphemistic and virtuous language. We’ve heard this thousands of times. Now, when someone encourages me to have an “open mind” I know that, most of the time, what they they want to do is CLOSE my mind and put a padlock on it.

    “You should keep an open mind”: this is just a new, polite way for superiors to talk to their inferiors, and to pretend that it’s all fine, dandy, horizontal and “equal.” To pretend that there is no inferior/superior involved, while the inferior gets some education from her superior, and while she gets to hear a “fresh point of view” (ha!) so that she can be brought around to the right way of thinking, and to feel that she’s come around to the right way of thinking in an atmosphere of freedom, respect, sharing and caring. In that way, when her radical/feminist viewpoint is altered (i.e., so compromised as to be destroyed) she can think and feel that no coercion was involved, and that it was all her own idea.

    No thanks.

  4. Yes, debating with men–stepping into the arena–is very similar to getting into bed with them. We know where that leads. For them, it’s sport; for us, it’s our bodies, our lives.

  5. I feel that as a Mother of two boys this is a extremely offensive way to bring about change. Excluding males from give their options is taking a human right from them and I don’t want my boys to grow up in a world where they are treated a certain way because of their sex. You are just bringing in more oppression to a world that we are already struggling to fight against. Two wrongs don’t make a right.

  6. First of all, men giving their opinions to women is not a human right. Being left alone is, however.

    If you think that a woman not wanting to talk to a man is a form of oppression, wait till I tell you what men are doing to women.

  7. “I don’t want my boys to grow up in a world where they are treated a certain way because of their sex.”

    This is a funny statement. Rich with irony.

    So is, “two wrongs don’t make a right.” Together with “you should keep an open mind” and other “golden rules” of social conduct, these are platitudes. Platitudes are used to stop conversations, to interfere with thinking, to simplify complexities, and to inject shame. They often work very well on women, even uppity ones, because women want, most of all, to be good (that is, safe).

  8. ” I don’t want my boys to grow up in a world where they are treated a certain way because of their sex.”

    Women are constantly being treated a certain way because of their sex. It’s wonderful that W4 has set boundaries around this space to provide us with a place where that’s not true. We have precious few places where we can be this free. Males have the rest of the damn world–we deserve to have a place of our own. Thanks, W4!

  9. W4–oopster is male. In one of the threads on your blog, he identified himself as transgender.

    (BTW, this is Morag. I had to create a WordPress account to reply).

  10. I also want to say, W4, that I think it’s a good thing that you’re now moderating comments. Thank you.

    The downside, of course, is that you have to see the threats and abuse all by yourself. As witchwind discussed in a recent post on her blog, being the gatekeeper, being the one who filters out the toxic waste, takes its toll.

  11. And I have temporarily changed the settings cause the MRA is spamming my blog with stupid comments about how I am Hitler. Sorry commenting is so tough right now. I will lighten it up.

  12. Yes, but I have actually reached a point, believe it or not, where the abuse does not even shock or stun me, hardly scratches my emotions. It’s laughable what they say, predictable. I mean, how many times can a man call me a fat dyke before I am just rolling my eyes? So unoriginal. The problem I see with it is that the violence is no longer visible so other women do not see what happens to other women, and it puts the abuse behind closed doors again so to speak.

  13. Don’t you think it would be better to scan for negative comments? I think it’s really important for men to understand what we’re going through, and if they’re not being informed about our oppresion, how will they fix it?

  14. “The problem I see with it is that the violence is no longer visible so other women do not see what happens to other women, and it puts the abuse behind closed doors again so to speak.”

    Yes, I’ve thought about this aspect as well. We do know the violence is always there, that we are surrounded by it all the time, both on-line and off-line. But, while we are enjoying a few moments of peace (which is necessary to our well-being and our ability to converse without interruption), there is probably a certain level of forgetting–an out-of-sight-out-of-mind kind of thing, just like so-called domestic violence.

    It’s a tough one. Which is exactly how they want it: for us to never forget we are under constant surveillance and threat. What some feminist bloggers do, as most of us have likely seen, is to let a few through, every now and again, but in a controlled way. It’s a reminder of the kind of male sociopathy that’s out there and why women-only spaces (or, at least, heavily moderated spaces) are necessary. Sometimes, these guys are even unintentionally hilarious in their stupidity and/or their evil, and thus have a certain entertainment value. Mostly, though, they are pure sewage, and very bad for our health. So, I come right back around to: good riddance!

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